Other Peoples' Lives

I may have done something rather inadvisable last night.... It may have involved not enough Fangria, the combined efforts of myself, safer666 and ramuth, and a copy of the Top Gear Challenges DVD. 

We have created a monster... The Top Gear Drinking Game.
I'm sure there are already versions of drink-along-with-Top-Gear out there, but this is ours. And I'm very very sorry.

The Rules:
Divide into three persons or teams. Each team is randomly allocated either Clarkson, May or Hammond.
Watch the DvD.
Drink at the appropriate moments, until no-one is safe to even go near a car, let alone drive it.

Everyone must drink when: 

• The presenters graffiti, mess with, sabotage or "help" with each other's vehicles
• One of the presenters addresses the viewer directly.
• They reference another BBC program or presenter.
• Someone is abandoned.
• Whenever you see a golden challenge envelope.
• Someone is particularly Un-PC in their humour.
• The Stig is introduced.
• They play music from the A-Team or someone says "cue the music"
• Someone tempts fate by saying "How hard can it be?" or similar.
• You hear the theme music.
• Something is set on fire.
• Law enforcement agencies (police, coastguard etc) appear.

Each team or person must drink when:

• Their presenter's car breaks down.
• Their presenter's nickname is mentioned.
• Their presenter modifies their vehicle mid-challenge.
• Their presenter wins the challenge.

The specific presenters also have drink conditions:

Clarkson: 

• Whenever he uses superlative hyperbole ("I am the most miserable man alive!" etc)
• Whenever he wields a hammer or power tool
• Whenever he yells "Come On!!!"

May:

• Whenever he swears, or mentions male genitalia. If he says "Oh Cock", drink twice.
• Whenever anyone mentions or references The War.
• Whenever he goes on about anything overly technical and dull. 

Hammond:

• Whenever he loses his temper.
• Whenever someone makes a joke about his height or teeth.
• Whenever he's picky about food.

As if this weren't enough... there is also a Hard Mode. In this, in addition to the above rules, everyone drinks when:

• Particularly Epic music plays
• Your presenter giggles/laughs maniacally
• Your presenter is bragging about their vehicle
•  Any time anyone says the word "horsepower"
• Continually drink during tech specs.
• Whenever someone cheats.
• The phrase "You blithering Idiot" is said.
• Your presenter is running on telly.

May

• Whenever James is singing
• Whenever he gets lost

Hammond

• Whenever Hammond Yells incoherently
• or says "Brilliant!"

Put it this way, we ran out of Fangria before we ran out of DvDs...